Yesterday I made pasta and drank wine. Literally, that's about all I did unless you count staying in bed reading most of the day, lying on the couch watching a Netflix movie, “Silver Linings Playbook” (Bradley Cooper and Jennifer Lawrence at their finest), attempting to walk my dog in a 107 degree hot air wind blast and scrolling thru Facebook. I felt pretty useless, but I guess everyone is feeling those emotions: good and bad, up and down, depressed and happy, it depends on the minute.
I would say that we're all riding the roller coaster of emotions with everything that's going on in the world and in our community: Covid, riots, Bighorn fire, political rants, super hot weather, worrying about our jobs, money, our health, our families, social isolation, not having a purpose, A;l of it up to an including the invasion of the Tarantula Hawks who spook me every time I leave my house!
We're all going through it, even my teenage son who slept with a machete(boys!) next to his bed one night because he read on social media that the riots were coming to Vail and they were going to burn down the town! Really? What town, the Safeway? My parents who are 77 and 84 and are confined to their home because they know they will die if they get this disease. Firefighters, caregivers, healthcare workers, the list goes on and on and every one of us are trying to cope as best we can. The struggle is real and it's scary.
I have good and bad days as we all do. Sometimes it's an effort to get out of bed and face the day. It makes me appreciate the life that I had and I miss it. I miss working, seeing friends, family, my clients and their families, networking events, taking my son to the gym or the skateboard park. I miss going out to lunch, my Sunday yoga class and every tiny thing that filled up my days. Life as we know it will never be the same and that makes me sad.
It appears that most of us are in varying stages of grief. When our world started crumbling around March, I was initially in shock and disbelief. I didn't think this would hit so close to MY community, MY home. Around April, I started obsessing on the news and communicating with my friends and family in NY and NJ. I felt guilty because they were in the midst of a huge crisis and I was busy enjoying walking my dog and riding my bike in the beautiful Tucson Spring weather. I naively thought covid would bypass Tucson. I wasn't working my days were my own.
As time passed Covid did infiltrate my peaceful bubble and I watched the numbers escalate, businesses close, hospitals and skilled nursing facilities fill up and I became Angry. How did we let this happen? Why didn't we have enough PPE? Why weren't we testing? I was mad as hell and felt powerless. I started meditating, praying and bargaining with my higher power. “If we do what we're supposed to do, can you make this go away, please?”
In the past two weeks I've been feeling depression and sorrow and I'm sure may of your can relate. I'm sad for our world and all of the it's people. This is a great tragedy and all of our lives have changed drastically. People we love are dying. Some are sick and some will never recover, it's sad. We're each doing the best we can in our own way, in our own time, plodding along, trying so hard to move forward.
This past weekend, I've been focusing on accepting what we're all experiencing and trying to welcome hope. We need to protect our souls and pray that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Practice what works for you: prayer, meditation, therapy, communication, hugging it out...whatever speaks to you and helps you on this journey. I express gratitude every day and that helps me to focus on the good in the world. We need to face the hard truth that we can't go back to the way things were and maybe that's a good thing. This might be a wake up call for all of us to realize what's important in our lives and figure out how we're going to move forward to lift up those around us and make the world a more loving and peaceful place for all of humankind.
Blessings and love to you all and I hope you're safe and healthy!
Robin Coats, Owner
Tucson Senior Placement
Practical Solutions to Enhance Quality of Life for Seniors and Their Families
Facebook – Tucson Senior Placement